Dealing With Dating Anxiety

Life is stressful as it is and adding relationships to the mix can play a very negative role on your anxiety levels, especially if you already have a habit of developing panic-stricken attacks when it comes to love and dating.

Over the last 10 years there have been progress in various therapies to help relieve the burden of anxiety. It is best that you try to avoid taking drugs to cope your dating anxiety.

Below are 4 'non-drug' dating anxiety prevention tips:

1. Instead of hiding your nervousness, admit it to yourself and your date. Often times what leads to a major anxiety attack spawns from trying to keep your initial nervousness covered up. If your 'special someone' comes into the room to see you then do not pretend your anxiety isn't there. Simply say "I am sorry if I appear nervous, but I am very nervous right now". Your date will appreciate the honestly and by telling him/her you'll feel a lot better.

2. If you had an anxious episode during a date then afterwards do not beat yourself up worrying how you acted. It's best just to give yourself affirmations in a positive manner that helps you build confidence and do better the next time around by taking control.

3. In order to calm down each time you have an anxiety attack, simply walk away and breath. If you happen to be with your new girlfriend or boyfriend then by following my previous tip on being honest with them about your nervousness, and also let them know that you need a minute alone, walk outside, and breath slowly until you regain composure. Before you know it, this simple technique will calm you down every time.

4. Pray... The power of prayer is amazing. Ask God for courage and strength to help you overcome your anxiety.

Dealing with Child Anxiety takes more than just therapy

Children often go out and play --- activities that are normal for their physical, intellectual, and emotional development. They go to school, do homework, do some errands, and play again. They interact often with peers and are always on the go. In some cases, children get a chance to feel the surge of anxiety in and around their busy environment. Child anxiety often shows up in school events (like sport games or a science test), and even because of peer pressure. Although a little worry and a little sense of competition may boost a child's performance in school, a positive fact since anxiety is often considered a negative response to challenging situations or problems.



But experiencing child anxiety in ill-suited situations can cause the kids to be extra stressful and distracted. It is a known fact that children are easily scared of anything. From spiders, frogs, monsters under their beds, dogs, or to the dark, they feel this rush of anxiety that makes them extra alert. Anxiety, in this case for children, is likewise general in nature—constant alertness. But it is essential that there exists a balance of anxiety that would not intervene with their daily normal functions.



Unfavorably for some, children also have different child anxiety disorders. Sometimes, children feel worried about something, making them think that they may fail in some way or another. This is an example of generalized anxiety disorder. Excessive worry for children can be treated by sharing them definite thoughts and giving them inspirational words, giving them an opportunity to learn how to “self talk” in a positive way. Other disorders also include panic disorder, often caused by panic attacks due to either psychological or physical harm. Another would be seperation anxiety disorder, that is common in young children who are extremely attached to either parents or siblings. Social and other specific phobias are also implications for such disorder, and is focused on fear of things or certain situations. A child with selective mutism often generates a feel of being alone. They usually do not converse with anyone or participate in any social interaction (in school or at home). Another would be having obsessive compulsive disorder (OCD) as a child, since it can also affect their way of living, and this specific disorder is mostly carried out through adulthood.



Coping with anxiety can be easy and effective if the method is proven to be safe and known by medical institutions. The support of parents is also important in effective treatment of serious emotional and psychological conditions. Other methods to manage stress in children include cognitive- behavioral therapy such as role playing, relaxation training, healthy thinking, exposure to positive and rational thoughts, and also family therapy --- which is acknowledged as one of the most effective ways for coping with anxiety.



Coping with anxiety in children takes time and effort from the therapists, doctors, and parents alike. Engaging them in proper social activities, helping them help themselves, and also praising them and constantly giving them gifts or goodies will give them more encouragement and support.

Dealing with anxiety before it turns to violence

Coping with anxiety is something that most people have probably dealt with at some point in their lives. Being nervous and twitchy about something is a natural reaction, particularly in a world of lawsuits, divorce papers, terrorist threats, and Orwellian paranoia. To top those off, there are also concerns about one's social status and place in the social hierarchy, which can sometimes compound social anxiety on top of regular anxiety. This multitude of factors makes coping with anxiety that much harder in modern society. While most people inevitably learn how to adapt, for others, coping with anxiety and having to deal with social anxiety can become a less than productive activity.



People with subtle mental issues, such as malignant narcissism, are hard to spot, though most experts agree that stressing out an already unstable mind can be a disastrous activity. Social anxiety is already seen as a common denominator among the psychological profiles of modern serial killers, with some people in the field believing it to be one of the root causes of the deviant behavior exhibited by such individuals. Others similarly theorize that the behavior of a serial killer is a way of coping with anxiety, albeit one that is affected by other psychological conditions.



Interestingly, people coping with anxiety and social anxiety do so in different ways, particularly in different cultures. For example, some Japanese people, buckling under the pressures of Japanese society and social duties, have found an unusual way of coping with anxiety. While the hikikomori tactic, which involves withdrawing from all social activity and interpersonal interaction for extended periods, is more accurately seen as running away from social anxiety, it is nonetheless their means of coping with the societal pressures in their lives.



Other Japanese people, generally males, have become drawn into otaku behavior as a means of dealing with social anxiety. In Japanese culture, an otaku is an obsessive fan of a particular show or series that ends up collecting each and every piece of merchandise of that specific obsession. While not as completely cut off from the rest of society as a hikikomori, an otaku is nonetheless a person that has little in the field of social skills, or at least perceives himself to lack such skills. To a degree, the otaku is using his obsession to substitute for human social interaction, though it also promotes meeting with similar individuals to locate potential buyers when the otaku eventually sells his collection in favor of starting a new one.



In Western culture, particularly in the US, social anxiety is seen as a weakness and something that is “not entirely normal.” Society has a tendency to push people that are socially withdrawn into the social arena, without any regard for their psychological capacity to adapt to such circumstances. In rare cases, when in conjunction with other mental disorders, these people can lash out at society, generally by openly rebelling against the social norm of their particular community. An example of this would be the “Goth” culture that crops up in some schools, which stand in direct defiance of the homogeneous social policies of most high school student bodies.



However, it is the ones that strike back covertly that one should be wary of. These people may not necessarily turn into serial killers along the lines of Dennis Rader, the infamous BTK strangler or Ted Bundy, they can potentially turn into another Dylan Klebold or Seng Hui Cho. The difficulty here lies in the fact that people tend to ignore the signs of this sort of backlash until the guns have already started blazing.

Curing Anxiety Without Medication...What The Professionals Don't Want You To Know.

As a psychotherapist in private practice for over a decade, I certainly have seen it all: watching my clients suffer through anxiety and stress, watching them go from medication to medication looking for "the right pill", and rarely finding it, spending inordinate amounts of money desperately trying to find the correct method to make their stress go away.

Can Anxiety Be Cured By A Pill or through Mental Health Counseling?

Anxiety is a complex issue...not just something that can be cured through popping a pill, or through one or two visits to a mental health counseling professional. And while a combination of both medication and counseling can be effective, unfortunately it can take years to see results...and often a lot of money.

If I Do Decide To Take Medication And See A Therapist, What Is The Best Type Of Therapy And Medication I Should Take To Help My Anxiety?

I can't answer that for you specifically, because every one is different (for example, you may have an allergy that precludes you from using a certain type of medication; Or you may not take well to a specific model of psychotherapy). That said, I can say that I have seen many of my clients do pretty well with what is known as "Cognitive Behavioral Therapy", in combination with a medication that their psychiatrist prescribed.

Isn't There Any Way To Get Rid Of My Anxiety Right Away, Instead Of Waiting The Years It Can Take For Medication and Counseling to Kick In?

Yes. For every year it takes to go through therapy and anti-anxiety medication, people can actually learn to make their anxiety disappear in 10 to 15 minutes. That doesn't mean that counseling and medication aren't viable options...but they are not the end-all cure-all for anxiety...they are merely supplements to help you get better. The majority of the work is done by "you". Not to mention...you save a great amount of your money and time.

Why Don't Psychiatrists Ever Tell You That You Can Learn to Make Your Anxiety Disappear On Your Own?

Bottom line: Because they need to make a living. If you did not see them for visits, these docs would not be in business. Don't get me wrong...there are some darn good professionals out there in the field of psychiatry.

But, the fact is, if the docs and shrinks let you know that you can learn, in 10-15 minutes, the secrets to curing your anxiety...they would lose a great deal of income.
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Counting our way out of anxiety

Mathematics is still one of the most challenging subjects faced by ordinary grade school and high school students. It is not uncommon to hear of students who flunk at math not just for because the subject is hard to learn, but also because they are afflicted with what is now called by teachers as --- math anxiety.



Math anxiety is referred to as an intense feeling of helplessness or frustration about one's ability (or lack of it) to accomplish mathematical tasks or solve mathematical problems. Some who have this “academic malady” claimed that their minds suddenly go blank and they feel terrified once they look at a mathematical question or test. Many have proclaimed their sworn hate for the subject and have simply resigned to what they consider to be fact --- that they cannot learn to do math.



But what does make math difficult, or at least, different? According to math teachers, their subject of expertise is unlike other courses or subjects taught in school for the following reasons:



1. Math involves the study of various processes. In other subjects, you learn and understand the material without necessarily having to apply it. In math, you have to learn the lessons or processes such as addition, subtraction, multiplication, and division – and then, you have to move on to a workbook, apply those lessons, and solve math problems.



2. Math is considered to be a linear learning process where one such process is taught and used today, and is used as part of the lessons of the following day, and so forth. Teachers say that when you study history, you can learn chapter 6 even without passing through some of the previous chapters. You can skip some parts of history and choose a specific section as part of the lesson. But in Math, you cannot study algebra without first mastering the four basic mathematical operations. Given this situation, it is easy to understand why some children who failed to master basic concepts find it hard to learn higher math concepts, and, as a consequence, they tend to develop math anxiety.

3. Like a foreign language, math must be practiced daily to retain your skills.

There are other reasons why math is very different from other subjects. But for sure, many children around the world have to grapple with the numbers and concepts that seem like undecipherable codes. Math anxiety has become so serious that some academicians believe it is one of the causes for school dropouts. They said that once the student who is struggling with math feels utterly frustrated in learning the concepts and processes. that student may conclude that going to school is futile. In fact, test anxiety is often linked to the fear of failing math or the fear of actually having to try to solve a mathematical problem. When a student fails to study or does not prepare sufficiently for an examination, nervousness and helplessness sets in. But for a student who suffers from math anxiety, preparing for the examination is already considered “mission impossible” since he cannot even learn the basic lessons. The only conclusion he can make is that he will fail the math exam --- again. Clearly, it can be expected that a student suffering from math anxiety would almost always show signs of test anxiety.

Now, what can we actually do to help children cope with math anxiety?



The first step is to recognize that math anxiety is an emotional response. It is not a permanent condition.

The second step is to know that certain myths and misconceptions have actually reinforced poor math performance. One such misconception is that a student can only be good either in language or in math, and not at both fields of study. A student who performs well in English grammar class may be a dunce at arithmetic, while a good math student would surely stammer during a poetry class. Education experts say that nothing can be farther from the truth. They insist that if schooled well, children can be good in languages and in numbers. They say that a good foundation in arithmetic is necessary to do well in higher level of mathematics. Academicians are also careful to add that teachers play a major role in developing a healthy and positive regard for studying math. If children experience repeated frustration and failure in learning math, it may be the “teacher factor” that is causing the anxiety and inability to learn. Good math teachers are necessary to make the subject more interesting and rewarding for the students. The third and most obvious step is to buckle down to work and try to learn math from the very beginning. As mentioned earlier, it entails a linear, progressive mastery of concepts and processes. As in all things in life, mathematics, too, must be learned one step at a time.

Counteract Anxiety Attacks

Sometimes life is hard and can cause you to feel out of control. Does anyone know what I'm talking about? Things are going well for a while and then it seems like out of no where comes something hard and unexpected that throws you into an anxiety attack? I have had this experience all too many times in my adult life, but it wasn't until recently that I began to be aware of the symptoms before they hit so that I could counteract the anxiety attacks.

Anxiety attacks are brought on by many different things and can affect people in vastly different ways. An event that may send someone into an anxiety attack may be handled with ease by another person. There is no telling what will or will not cause an anxiety attack to occur. We can, however, learn our own bodies and responses so that we can be better prepared when anxiety attacks occur.

For me, anxiety attacks seem the most likely when I am dealing with health issues with myself or my family. For some reason, I have always felt anxious about health related issues and potential health problems in the people I care about most. My husband, on the other hand, takes health related issues in stride yet finds himself dealing with anxiety attacks over financial issues that threaten our family. I am so thankful that while anxiety attacks are a normal part of life, that not everyone deals with them the same or gets them at the same time. Can you even imagine a world like that?

I have learned myself pretty well over the years, so that now I know how to counteract anxiety attacks. The biggest thing that I need to do is to get away and get alone. This could mean walking into another room or getting outside for a walk or run. I know that my anxiety attacks are made worse when I am forced to deal with them in front of people. Another key for me in counteracting anxiety attacks is to get active. Taking time regularly to exercise is one of the best methods of stress control and hence anxiety attack prevention for me. The more active I am, the less the little things seem to stress me out.

Figure out the things that cause anxiety attacks in you and look for good ways to counteract them. Your life will be a lot more manageable if you can learn to take things in stride and to not let small things lead to big anxiety attacks. Talk with a doctor or a counselor for more advice.

Coping with stress and anxiety among teens

Most people see the beginning of life once a baby is born. The process of human development slowly unfolds when that infant grows into a cute little toddler --- “learning the ropes” of speech, walking, eating, and playing. Parents, naturally, add Band-Aid and disinfectants to their grocery list as their children begin to take a more daring, active role at home and in play school. After a few years, that baby is expected to be ready for school. As any parent would say, time flies so fast and before they know it --- the little kid they used to take and fetch from the community kindergarten is now a young man or young lady in high school. In high school, these young people experience new things. They discover new emotions and ways of thinking. Naturally, they have to endure the awkward situation of no longer being kids yet still far from being adults. Most teenagers wonder how being a teen can be so fun yet to full of anxiety. And for most high schoolers, nothing can be more fun and anxiety-filled than have their first serious relationship.



Social and personal relationships are very important to teenagers. At the same time, relationships are among the top issues that cause the stress and anxiety. Problems in their relationships, made worse by their difficulties at home and in school, can sometimes be so serious that it affects their ability to be happy and well-adjusted individuals.



Given this situation, every teenager should somehow be taught how to cope with stress and anxiety --- especially if it's about a boy-girl situation. In a romantic relationship, it is but normal to have petty quarrels and even serious fights that could lead to a cool-off or a total break-up. For adults, these situations may seem to petty or even downright laughable. But for these teenagers, their relationship with their first boyfriend or first girlfriend really do mean the world to them. The newly discovered passion that is almost beyond control can consume most of the daytime thoughts of a teen with raging hormones. Episodes of romantic affirmation, jealousy, and self-doubt takes the teenager on an emotional roller coaster. But aside from love issues, teenagers are preoccupied with their need to have a sense of belonging...the frustration of “not being understood”...and the need to have their own self-identity.



For teens, is done through several ways. To get by through high school, these young people try different things to cope with their stress and anxiety. For the rebels, a beer bash and a night of partying would suffice. The alcohol, loud music, and dancing are considered good enough diversions or means of coping with anxiety. For the “straight A” students, more hours at the library may just do the trick. The books offer not only additional information they can incorporate into their essays and research papers. Books are also an excellent escape from all the stress and anxiety of being unpopular and branded as “geeks.” For the jocks, stress and anxiety are also inescapable facts during basketball championship season.



Being young and inexperienced, young people tend to see life not as a process of learning. The spirit-driven youth take each day as it is --- trying to stuff their entire life into 24 hours of laughter, adventure, and, yes, hours of self-grooming. But on those days that they find little to laugh about or very few things to be inspired about, teenagers are forced to look at themselves face-to-face in a mirror. They revel in the thought that they have outgrown those days when they were too dependent on their parents and elder siblings. Still, they grow apprehensive about what the future has in store for them.



Some who adjust well just accept the fact that adolescence is but part of natural human development. There is no escaping youth --- with all its joys and troubles. For those who have learned the art of coping with stress and anxiety, learning more about life is a truly exciting experience that is worth all the bruises and heartaches.